Pollution Pun Master Gifts

"What are we going to do about those air pollution complaints?"

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

I will study my speling words...

Wife: 'Ah, honey.....why are you covered in raw fish and rice?' Husband: 'Oh I was running late for the 6:15 and got on a darn sush train by mistake!'

"Bed Spread"

"Just for the heck of it, how do you plead?"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

"Your top 10 list of reasons why you didn't do your homework is creative, but not acceptable."

"We're standing in forever chemicals."

"Dogs are men."

'Your Grounded!'

"What can I say? I was an English major."

'I wonder why my master never makes it into the Master's Tournament?'

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

Biology Laboratory: No Cellfies

"Hey, Sisyphus, when you've got a minute I'd like to discuss this progress report with you."

'This must be the effect of the climate change! Even the data cloud has started to rain!'

"In mitigation, Sunny Chemicals would like to point out that prior to contracting his skin allergy, Mr Crumb was already ugly."

Card shark

"I was going to tell you a joke about my snack, but I thought it might be a bit too cheesy...."

If you think that's good, you should see the Pork Sabre!

Doric, Ionic and Platonic.

Barbed Pen

"I see you've come prepared for an in-depth interview."

"I like my World History teacher. If I get a 'C,' he calls it 'trying hard.' If I get a 'B,' he calls it 'studying hard'."

'I had a birdie on the seventh and an eagle on the ninth...delicious!'

"Blood sweat and tears. I think it's supposed to make us feel guilty."