Poll Reader Pillows

Climate Change is Real

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

Annual Pollsters Convention. Wow, who could've predicted such a low turnout?

'According to the latest poll, 64% of the public don't pay any attention to polls...'

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

'Nothing's happened today-read it dead slowly.'

'The popularity polls love what you've done with the budget deficit....moving the decimal one point to the left.'

'It's our latest line-suits for t.v announcers'

Poll Dancing

"Do I take it that we can't be guaranteed your vote in the forthcoming election?"

How is the campaign taking shape? Poseidon is washed up but all the other candidates have a chance. Voters like Cyclops' unique vision ... Mercury delivers his message well ... Ares has support from the defense hawks ... and some say Narcissus is an attractive candidate. Narcissus like the support reflected in polls and loves what he sees reflected in pools!

"Would you like your MP not to stand at the next election?"

"I am in a buying mood, but I still can't afford to buy anything."

"The latest poll numbers must be out."

'Our poll shows the typical voter is all polled out.'

Dropping Popularity of Obama.

"It's seasonal, like the first gritters of Winter and the first cuckoos of Spring...the first pollsters of the election!"

"I'm undecided, but that doesn't mean I'm apathetic or uninformed."

Fiona Bruce

Babbling Idiot

"Of course, this prediction has a plus or minus margin of error of 80% or 90%."

"The latest numbers are in. More voters want you to drop out than to run."

Trump vs. Biden

'Remember, Fenton, polling results are in the eye of the manipulator.'

"Your poll results on't look good. You're trailing 'statistically insignificant'."

'Sorry, sir, but we don't have a category for that.'

'You are polling very well with the highly motivated 18 to 26 year olds who never vote.'

"The network's infotainment division thinks you should open with a song."

'In your opinion, who was the worst U.S. president since W.W.II...?'

'ANCHOR doesn't mean you drag the whole network!'

'I got a video broadcasting degree with a minor in news reading and a major in perky.'

"This is Ritz Rose, substituting for the vastly over rated Ed Yomp..."

Mr. Frog. Poll. Poll. I'm not looking forward to this. Amphibians can never make up their minds --- first it's one way and then the other.

"Have you got the abridged version?"