Podium Performers Gifts

"Feel free to use it. It's an emergency escape hatch if you say something controversial."

Gymnasts falling off the winners pedestal.

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!

First Prize!

Jungle Games

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

'A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something.'

"I seem to have forgotten what I was going to say...please...hold the applause!"

Driver at Grand Prix shooting another driver with the cork from champagne

Champions biting their medals

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

Dolphin wins the swimming competition.

1 2 3

'... And now I shall pass you over to tonight's speaker who will give a brief summary of my introduction.'

Bahrain F1

Soccer Fans.

A medal podium with places for first, second and third is contrasted with a spot at the bar for fourth place.

"I'm so nervous! I feel like you're all in my stomach."

"I'm going to make eye contact only with this side because of the crick in my neck."

Skiers

Choir wearing masks.

Dyslexic Olympics.

'Thank you for that kind introduction, Ed, but frankly, I would've liked a little further ado.'

Gymnastic Winner.

"This is our new 'winning isn't everything' approach."

Third place sabotaging first place on medal stand.

Boris Johnson Loses

Winner Celebrating with Champagne

Sanna Marin party

The dream works when the team works.

"Sorry, guys, but we'll have to take back your medals. We got feet and meters mixed up."

'Dropping From A Height In A Vacuum event.'

'It is this celebrity culture, they won't do anything by practise medal ceremonies.'

'Hop, skip & lump championships.'