Pocket Money Negotiator Gifts

'You say you can't afford to raise my allowance -- could I please see the books?'

"You say it all the time, so I climbed every tree to prove it. You were right, money doesn't grow on trees."

"Dad, this is Wendy, she's going to re-negotiate my allowance!"

'My allowance isn't much - but I have a great benefits package!'

'I've crunched the numbers and you can afford to increase my allowance by 15.5%.'

'In the future, if we're a little late with your allowance, don't just automatically turn it over to a collection agency.'

"I don't get an allowance. I get earnings per share."

'I know that other kids manage on ?5 pocket money - but their parents don't charge them to watch any television programme their parents don't happen to approve off!'

"Want to trade banks with me?"

"All this is mine now! I had my lawyers declare you incompetent!"

'Just sign your approval for the heliport and we can both go about our business.'

'The good news is that what you save on my hair cut can be added to my allowance.'

"Basically, we have two options: #1: Do what I suggest because I'm the boss and I say so. Or, #2: I launch into an excruciatingly dull, long and detailed presentation explaining my position. You decide."

'Once they noticed your tail wagging, they stopped upping their offer.'

'My competitor down the street sasses his parents.'

'When it comes to giving a bonus...some people will stop at nothing.'

'I'm looking for you to get me more QUID in my Quid pro quo.'

'Management says we've had it too good for too long. They're demanding concessions.'

"Between the price of a comic book and having to pay the bully down the street not to beat me up, my allowance is spent the same day I get it!"

"How many investment apps will this get me?"

'This bathroom ain't big enough for the both of us.'

'I'm done with school because all I need to make a living is to know how to persuade my dad to give me money!'

'Dickson, how many times do I have to tell you, don't start out with the price!'

"Those are my money managers."

'It's a deal. You buy my insurance and I'll buy your knitted booties.'

'Actually I am having a happy childhood, except, of course, for my unhappy allowance.'

"Give it all you got is the motto of my wife's divorce attorney."

"When I first took over discipline was very bad. Well I'm glad to say we now seem to have turned a corner!"

"$100? What are you doing ... fracking your own gas?"

"Is that the corporate rate?"

Billy strip: tooth fairy.

"Baldo, can you wash the dishes for me? Or I won't help you with your homework for a month!"

Subway rider holds onto man's tie.

"Penny for your thoughts, Jenkins? I'd sell you mine but you couldn't afford them."