Plumbing Puzzle Fan Gifts

"I think the flush is broken."

A Brain Drain

'Look a huge bird!'

'Think about it: If we blow up the bridge, they'll have to swim across again...'

"My reflexes are not what they used to be: This is how I catch birds now..."

A dog and a robot dog

I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University. Seriously? Nobody's going to go to a psychologist who's got a diploma from some random online college. And psychologists have to have a whole arsenal of treatments. They can't just use reverse psychology for everything. So what you're reverse-saying is, I'll be sought-after and highly effective. No that's ... ok, yes, that's exactly what I'm saying.

"Hmm.... I think I'd better keep this to myself."

"You arrive early, You work hard, You stay focused. What's your game?"

The King's New Robes.

Tic tac toe.

'Think about it: If you eat me now, you won't get an egg every day...'

"Well, if everybody does it, it must be o.k."

"He's on your 'personal computer'. . . his name is Norman and he's really good at mental arithmetic."

Geographic Oddities. It defies logic, but Little Rock is a bigger city than Boulder.

Gustav Klimt

"Just Desserts" and "Unjust Desserts"

"Shall we bother with the sweet, chubby-chops?"

'So that's what hockey players do in summer.'

"Okay people, pagers, beepers, and cell phones ON."

Chicken and egg in a waiting room: 'Who was first?'

'According to the surveys nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot...'

Ah ah! That's what I thought! The DNA tests prove that he is in fact a Cuckoo chick...'

Okay, Ernie, tell me if my left turn indicator is on. Yes - No - Yes - No - Yes.

'This may take awhile -- I'll have to go back to the shop for lunch.'

Rubik's Cuba.

'What the heck ever happened to all the great polka bands.'

"It seems reasonable to assume that eating the stuff won't do us any good either."

'Fred's not sure who to call first: 911 or the plumber he should have called in the first place.'

Rorschach multiple-choice test.

'Whew!'

"Can you turn your video on, Ralph?"

Merge left...merge right...converge center....

'I still prefer the pipe. A ceremony isn't the same sharing nicotine peace gum.'

'I'm sorry, Andrew, we're just not a good fit.'