Playful Prattler Pillows

'This is my little brother -- He believes in freedom of screech.'

Ice Cream Surgeon

A Hole in the Dike

'Let's pretend I'm a business owner and you're the janitorial service...'

'It's a zen diaphragm.'

"I'm not so sure I can handle this."

Junior Doctor.

'Don't forget to talk about their dog!'

I'm not just jumping on the bed. I'm perfecting bedspring-cusion calasthentics!

Playing Doctors.

"I thought you might like to hear how my love-making sounded when I was a younger man."

Whale blowing soap-bubbles.

'I'll put one end of the hose in your pool...you take the other end outside...gravity will create a siphon and drain the water with no mess.'

"Race you to the spleen!"

'Pluck me.'

Hazardous Wastes R Us.

'One of the quickest ways to meet people is to pick up the wrong ball'

"It's not real meditation when you SMIRK like that!"

'Good Now stuff that round thing in the hoop,,,, That's basketball,'

"Congratulations. I just need your initials here."

"Now, let's try a Waltz. Don't worry about me though, I'm wearing safety boots..."

'He taught me how to fetch, heel and roll over. And I taught him all he needs to know about cats.'

At 'Appy 'Ampstead on Easter Monday.

'Mind if I cut in?'

"Must you go 'beep beep beep' every time you back up?"

"Stop annoying my pooch!"

'For goodness sake, Harry. All the child wants to do is take out your appendix.'

'Do I have to fetch the newspaper? -- Peter Hitchens always leaves a bad taste in my mouth!'

"Ding dong ditch is fun, but it's better to watch their reactions when you pretend to be soliciting."

'Why are you so rude?'

Motorbike

'Hey, Thunder Thighs, Bean Pole's here!'