Playful Litigator Pillows

'First, I'd like to list the mitigating circumstances.'

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

'Court's in recess!'

"After I graduate middle school, high school and college, I'll go to law school to get you out of this. But I want my retainer now."

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"Sklar, Liebowitz, Rubin and Kaminsky... Attorneys a go-go."

'I'm suing my way alphabetically through the phone book.'

"Let's take in a trial."

Clive Anderson

Law Offices

"First, admit no harm."

'Your Honor, my client is incontinent to stand trail...'

Playing Doctors.

"I think I can get you off with a lighter sentence, but it might screw up your movie deal."

"The only thing trivial about pursuing this trivial lawsuit is my fee!"

'These are from my attorneys for malpractice suit.'

"Mr. Packard will sue you now."

"We represent a North Carolina trade association and we'd like to file suit against the Native Americans for introducing our clients to a certain agricultural product."

"I can destroy your bank of knowledge with one blast from my destructo-beam!"

Computer questionning a witness.

'I've always been a proponent of winning people's hearts and minds by suing them.'

Suees and Sueers

'Overruled. Now answer the question. We could all use a good laugh.'

'Ladies and gentlemen... let's not quibble, when we can sue.'

'I want the jury to completly disregard counsel's back flip.'

"Any history of medical malpractice suits in your family?"

Chemical Lawyers.

"After all, it is a frivolous lawsuit..."