Playful Destroyer Pillows

Stuff Broken

'have you broken all of your Christmas presents yet?'

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

Polar bear bowling alley

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

Seven deadly sins shopping plaza

Fat Kid 28- Discovers his feminine side

The Fall from Pisa

School Recycling Bins:Paper,Stone,Scissors

Boyfriend scores notches on wall by bed.

Call it Tough Love.

"Wanna do lunch?"

'I didn't know people still played footsie.'

'By the way, no one has ever beaten me and lived to tell about it.'

Valentine's Day calls for a romantic candlelight dinner and soft music. Then a trip back to my place for some heavy groping and groaning.

Whale blowing soap-bubbles.

'Did you see who pushed you?'

Candles In Bed

"I hereby declare this planet for Oxymaxian territory"

Introvert-in-a-Box

"You're all arms Rodney."

"Sometimes I think the captain doesn't appreciate the seriousness of military maneuvers."

'I see you opened it yourself, but there'll still be a service charge.'

Umbrella fight.

At 'Appy 'Ampstead on Easter Monday.

'Don't you wish sometimes there was something we could chase without catching up to it?'

"Hey, will you kids stop trying to stick fridge magnets on your Aunt Marge!"

You stink at Halo 5. I have no thumbs!

'You don't either have a date with Dora the Explorer!'

'Can I call you back, I'm chasing a car.'

'It looks like I'm finally going to break 70.. this is my 69th club I've broken.'

"Hon, it's been more that four hours. Shouldn't we call the doctor?"