Playful Debater Gifts

"Jersey Tomatoes" vs. "Jersey toMAHtoes"

The real cause of cloud to cloud lightning.

'Do you think that's wise?'

"Just for the sake of argument, let's disagree."

As usual, the obvious precedent for this case is The Children v. Mommy. The Supreme Court, Juvenile Division.

'Your brother sure ha some kind of weirdo creepy imagination.'

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

"When I was a teenager 'Saturday Night Live' had Mike Myers, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman..."

"And today if the prosecutor says 'Liar, liar, pants on fire,' do not turn around to check."

Children Demand Parental Term Limits.

Prisoner speech

Big people always make a mess of things phobia: 'Let's play grownups. You'll be for busing and I'll be against it.'

'Did you ever wonder why iced coffee is goof but cold coffee isn't? . . . You're not curious like I am.'

"My concession speech will be brief. You win."

"I can't decide if that was bad in a good way, good in a good way, good in a bad way, or bad in a bad way."

"I can destroy your bank of knowledge with one blast from my destructo-beam!"

"If thinking about sin is as bad as committing it, why not go ahead and commit it?"

I have a confession. Sometimes I doubt that God is really a giant chicken. Eggnostics.

The controversy of ROW VS WAIT: 'Row, to find fish!'

'Well, now, let's just shine the light of common sense and linear thinking on this little computer problem of yours, shall we?' 'I'm not THAT desperate yet.'

"The world needs revolutionaries...people who challenge the system, who question authority, who aren't afraid to say, 'I won't take anymore!'"

'I'm not a wine snob. You're a wine ignoramus.'

"I disagree. I think we're ninety percent breeding and ten percent grooming."

"Advantage, Mom."

'So you're the boy who wants to be a chugger.'

"Why not use thoughts and prayers to stop abortions? That's what you've been using to stop school shootings."

"Oh, yeah! Well my dad says St. Joe is too the patron saint of coffee!"

"My grandmother died last night even though I prayed for her..." "...I guess I should brace myself for a sarcastic comment about faith."

'It's always the same...Terry and Mike have a few drinks and then they start to kick off.'

"Why should our kids feel entitled to the lives our parents worked so hard to provide for us?"