Plant Juggler T-Shirts

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

Man with balloons about to bump into a woman with a cactus

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

Work/Life Balance

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Look Billington, if you can't take the strain, tell me, ok?"

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

"You say you’re currently holding down 3 jobs...very impressive."

'You call it diversified work experience.. I call it can't hold a job.'

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

Brickie's Mate

"I've given up trying to be on top of things."

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'What do I do around here? Sir, I really think I deserve some time for research and preparation before answering that.'

(an employee is in grasp of a giant octopi.The employee's boss is yelling at him through a bull-horn) 'Mr. Smith! According to H.R., you can no longer be employed here! Alright H.R., you can set Mr. Smith down now!'

'Regarding where you stand for a payrise - you don't.'

Waiter: 'I'm not really a waiter, I'm an actor. I'll act like I'm waiting on you.'

The Music of Life (in the key of dna).

"Well it looks like we're all here."

'Word has it that you have an ulcer, Tomkins. Nice going! You'll find an extra 20 bucks in your paycheck.'

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

'Of course you're overworked and underpaid! Didn't you read the fine print in your employee's contract?'

'Uh-oh... the boss is wearing his safety boots! That means, someone will get kicked out today!'

Jack and the Beanstalk.

"I hate my job and I'm terrified of losing it."

'I'm married to my job, and now it wants a trial separation!'