Planning For Retirement Gifts

'You have to think long-term. You can't afford to be old yet.'

"I didn't want to be a burden to my family, but I've changed my mind."

"If I apply for early Social Security, I get this. If I wait until I only have one life left, I get this."

"...if you set aside 2% of your salary for your pension you can retire at 97."

'The strange thing is it started out as a blueprint for a retirement plan.'

"It's from our tax consultant. We forgot to beef up our pension scheme, so now we're going to be extinct."

Baby Boomers vote

Expensive nursing home

"I can afford to die or I can afford to be sick, but I can't afford to be sick and then die."

'He's making preparations for his elderly care.'

Rolling Over a Pension.

"So I take it my plans to retire on 75% salary at 55 may need looking at again?"

Pension Planning is Enormously Complex

"My financial advisor told me not to retire unless I win the lottery."

"No, we're going to see a financial advisor, we can't be flippant about our retirement money."

"He's working out how much he needs to put in so that he can leave after lunch!"

"I recommend you invest in immortality drugs or time machines. You'll need one or the other if you ever hope to retire."

"I've thought about retiring, but there's a great deal of gravity under this chair."

"Have you thought about retirement - with me?"

"Not what I meant when I asked you to think about retiring early."

"I'm now too old to produce milk, and I can't afford to retire as yet, so I've had to diversify..."

"Now that I've paid off my student loans, I'd like to work on a retirement plan."

'I want to make enough to retire early.'

"According to these calculations, you have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of the afternoon."

'I was planning to retire next year but I think I'll go bankrupt instead and live off the bailout.'

Couple with confusing pamphlets

'I pleaded with Old Mother Hubbard to make adequate provision for her retirement.'

'If we both work and set aside ten percent of our annual income, we can retire at ninety.'

'You wouldn't spend all your money and expect the same standard of living in retirement?'

PERSONNEL, 'Our retirement plan is that we try to get you Swedish citizenship.'

"The government is committed to reducing its interference in the pension industry..."

"I don't think it's ever to early to be looking at your savings planning."

'After looking over your portfolio, I don't think 'enough' will be enough.'

"If you're so good, why are you still working?"

"My massive 401(K) retirement savings is going way too slowly."