Planet-friendly Punster Pillows

'I bought this energy saving bulb in your shop, but it doesn't work.'

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

You too?! I go around feeling half asleep all the time also!

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

Water is discovered on the moon....

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

"Igor, you fool! I said 'healthy brain'!"

Garden of Eden and scrumping

Standings: Milky Way Conference

'This must be the effect of the climate change! Even the data cloud has started to rain!'

Little Farm Shop of Horrors with G.M produce turned into man eating plant

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

Atlas working out with the earth as his exercise ball.

"No, I'm not a hare, I just happen to have big ears..."

Uranus always gets a bad rap. Tap tap tap tap tap. What do you mean, dorkboy? I mean, no matter how mature people think they are, they always, always want to chuckle when they say "Uranus." Come on, Sadie. You know you want to smirk, even if it's in secret. What if I told you Uranus is slightly bigger than Neptune? Not chuckling! Uranus is always the butt of the joke.

Bitter End

'Its a dogwood tree. I can tell by its bark.'

'Your North Pole is wobbling - you should see a spin doctor.'

Sure, Jupiter's the biggest, but I hear he uses Asteroids to build up his bulk!

'Catching lunch again Steward?'

They just found two more dark moons around Uranus. Are you winding up to some sort of sophomoric joke? No, they really do think they found two new moons there. Kind of suspicious, if you ask me. As long as I can remember, Uranus had 27 moons, and the Solar System had 9 planets, including Pluto. Now those numbers change all the time. Next thing you know, they'll be telling us we have to Uranuses. Yeah ... pretty sure you're winding up to some sort of sophomoric joke.

'My mom says an apple a day keeps the physician's assistant away.'

I have a higher escape velocity than you! It has nothing to do with being clingy!

"The planet appears to be inhabitable but more like low-income inhabitable."

The Dark Side of the Moon.

'Hey, Lady, this is a sixty zone!'

'Remember this test, Ms. Hart? Nineteen ninety. Multiple choice. You asked which of these is not a planet, and I checked Pluto...'

How the planets of the solar system are known to their friends

International Carrot Day April 4th

'Pretend you don't notice San Andreas.'

He's very defensive about his personal space.