Plagiarism Ponderer Gifts

"Go ahead. Don't think of it as plagiarism, think of it as an homage."

"A book report? -- Wouldn't that be a copyright violation?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

Sauce for the Goose

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

'It's some more story ideas from Francis Bacon.'

"Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study."

I don't think I'm letting sunlight in when I open the curtains. I think the darkness is going out.

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

"Believe me when I tell you that I'm not that honest."

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

Afraid of change - leave it here.

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

'...and that is my philosophy.'

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

"Now, my brave little soldier, do you have everything...an apple for your teacher, your satchel, pencils and books - your existential misery??"

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

Le Penseur (D' Apres Rodin)

"I think it's wrong to hunt them when they're in a house of worship."

CCTV in church.