Pizza Debater Pillows

"You owe me five bucks."

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

"Let me get this, but keep in mind that you'll pay for it in other, more subtle ways later on."

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

Mayo-A-Mayo

'Do I believe in evolution? - Well, I suppose we should get it over with.'

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

'Nobody goes there anymore.' 'Because it's too crowded.'

Delivery of Sermon within 30 minutes or your second one's FREE!

'You're cute when you blow your cool.'

"Yes, I know that chocolate comes from the cocoa Bean...but that does NOT count as a vegetable!"

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

'You want a pizza with everything? -- Do you comprehend the philosophical implications of that?

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

Pizzas

'I managed to crack a smile during the first 15-minures but the last 45-minutres were a bust!

"Steak for breakfast, steak for lunch, steak for dinner. . . you can't stop evolution!"

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'

'It was the last straw when she threw her lumpy gravy over me!'

'And just how much is silver going for a troy ounce these days?'

"You ordered mammoth again?"

"Never eat anything you can't lift over your head."

'What do you mean, it's good for me and I'll like it? That sounds like a contradiction in terms.'

"The social conservative in me tells me to pay for dinner, but the fiscal conservative thinks we should split it."

'I wouldn't say you're boring, Chuck, but you're the only person I know who records The Weather Channel.'