Pixel Prodigy Gifts

Rage.

The Computer Bore

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

Homo Gamus

His family thought he'd been wasting his life, but Steve Wiebe was about to prove everyone wrong.

'You could do that.' I did

'I think what we need now is someone called a computer programmer.'

'I've got one week to master this program. The boss is threatening to hire an eight year old.'

"His first word was 'Dotcom'."

You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it.

"You're just gaming down there? Shouldn't you be issuing your first IPO for some billion dollar internet enterprise you've created?"

"Attendance is up, but they tune out my sermon to play wordle."

Internet Cafe.

Pushed to the max by the algebra test, Tim's brain spontaneously combusted.

"The margin of error is plus or minus one hundred percent."

"All the salmon has disappeared yet every door to the house was locked. Oh, it's a mystery all right."

'I know I can't take it with me, but what about computer simulations?'

"Stop staring"

"Still on your left."

"Cool game!"

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

'Oh yes, Steve is very smart. . . he even does the crossword puzzles in ink.'

Videogame Employment Agency.

"Those are my unfinished connect-the-dots which I plan on finishing when I learn how to count past 10."

'I'd like you to meet our new programs director.'

'So you're a billionaire... Now what?' 'Have you learned to clean your room yet?'

'Is that the computer language you've been studying in school, dear?'

'Please pardon the inconvenience while this web page is under construction.'

'I am playing outside, Mom -- look at the graphics.'

Since Greg was accepted by Mensa, he'd rather not say anything than say something incorrect.

New Year's Resolution.

'I wrote a software program and sold it for two million dollars.'

'Dude, I think your memory card is full.'