Pit Bull Protector Gifts

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

No Soliciting

'He has a big heart. . . inviting his homeless friends in to stay dry.'

"Don't even think about it."

"And with you on guard, I won't have to worry about that monster under my bed."

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

Polar Bear at the Ice Machine

"Actually, 'Loss of Limb' would be covered under your homeowners policy."

Fox and a little girl hiding from the rest of the hunt.

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

"We're looking for a 5000 step walk."

'Since the North Pole melted and we had to migrate south our camouflage stinks!'

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."

"Don’t worry, girl. I’m working on our ‘no puppy left behind.’"

Hope...

"Someday, my son, that will mean you."

'I'm a guard dog too.'

"Well, we can kiss being free-range goodbye."

Orange Bengal Tiger

'Have you seen little Spotty?'

Clever pitbulls.

Save our seals - "I doubt my little vote will make any difference."

Fight against theft of endangered species

"Hello? I`d like to report a missing person..."

'Be careful, I hear he kills cats.'

"Jd Vance wants to visit"

Polar Bear arrives at house

'Before you buy the gun can I ask if you thought about taking your cat to the vets first?'

Sick polar bear humour...

"Ralphie, no! Not on my Kindle!"