Piscine Pun Lover Pillows

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

Two love poems in swimming pool. Shallow end and deep end.

'Ships plumber reporting for duty.'

Man jumping into swimming pool with phone.

"Everybody out of the water! Lawyer!"

Swimming Champion.

"There weren't any more clown fishes at the pet shop, so they got me - a jester fish."

"Hey Kevin! Care to enter the office football pool!"

Cutting round an igloo...

'I didn't know you had this pool heated!'

"You were doing 10 knots over the limit."

"Aye, folks often get us mixed up, but I'm actually Capt'n Bluetooth."

First Dive

"I love your short-hand. It looks just like a page of wriggly worms!"

Fish in school to other fish: 'I did well in marine biology today - it was an open-brook test.'

"I told you not to get central heating."

'Why are you so crabby today, did you come out of the wrong side of the reef?'

'Which one do you want to read?'

Polar bears separated by broken ice. One says: 'You must come over to ours for Boxing Day.'

"She's my sole mate."

Whale Whale Whale.

Caution Pool Drained.

"Just because you’re a right whale doesn’t mean you’re always right!"

Barnacles Rock Barnacles in the form of farm Barns.

"You are using an unregistered copy of this software...please register..."

'Yes it can be tedious son. But the 'net pay's not too bad!'

"Somehow I feel very secure in this blanket of plankton!"

Whale with a fish eye.

"Follow me and I'll make you 'fishers of men'!"

'The employment agency said you were looking for someone to do light housekeeping.'

Unbottled water is for sale next to bottled water in supermarket aisle.

Plaster of danger