Pirate Adventures Gifts

'ARRRG!! What does ye use for blood stains?'

'Son, as I can see it, your career prospects as a pirate seem to be... hm...limited!'

Remote control pirate bully

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

'Cannonball!'

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

"Look what I found. Can we keep him?" "Wow! A real pirate!!" "Go ask your mother."

Piracy on a boating lake

The Dubloon Stops Here

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

'Are we there yet?'

No caption. (On a pirate ship various flags fly, including flags with a skull and crossbones and other banners showing logos from various social media sites. On the boat deck below, a pirate is looking at his cell phone).

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

"Buzz off, Fly-boy. We don't need more accessories."

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

"As I was only saying the other day..."

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

'Isn't he supposed to sit on your shoulder Captain?'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

Treasure Island Book.

Any idea how long your family might be visiting?

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

Pirates double up as a scratching post.

"Shiver-me-timbers, wench! How many times have I got to tell you? I'm not winking at you!"