Pipeline Buff Gifts

Because of Bob's excessive gas, the Alaskan natural gas pipeline make a detour...

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

"Free Bird!"

'Never underestimate the value of pipe-dreams, my son.'

'I've written six books on wine; owned my own winery and taught a wine class for two years. My next goal is to taste some.'

"We've had too much rain - they don't have enough - we'll sell our rain and make millions!"

Welcome to Elmville "Home of the world's biggest pothole." The mayor sure knows how to make the best of a bad situation!

'When London Bridge fell down, how much was the contractor sued for?'

'If you plan to run a half-marathon you won't want a stopwatch, you'll need a calendar!'

"Can you recommend a suitable white wine to drink with my red wine?"

"I now recognize the basement was a bad idea."

They Always Say That

The Mayor Alonzo Q. Furdweiller Pothole. Looks like the mayor and the city council are bickering again.

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

'We've found the problem...'

Silver Sufferer - husband looking at steam trains on the internet, wife bored in background

"I think we can agree that the bridge collapsing is not a good thing."

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

Personnel. You did high-tech work in this railroad job? It was a part-time position --- I was a semi-conductor.

'It took you three years to build it. I'll have it down in 15 minutes.'

"That chew toy was boring, so I got on your computer. Apparently, neither one of you has a clue about basic computer security and maintenance."

Internal Combustion.

'Well darn it...this isn't right...somebody should have let you know the highway was coming this way.'

Betting on $80 oil price.

Safety - "Don't tick off Tiny."

Men Working Since 1931

'This $10,000 bottle of Bordeaux is also a powerful solvent. It entirely dissolved my savings account.'

Bridge opens for passing swans.

'We have other ways to deal with people who can't pay the toll, Franklin.'

Preparing to paint an un-still life.

'Coal liquefaction plant' 'Oil Solidification plant'

'Someone's got to do something about these pot holes!'

Noah's ark in a draught.

Man using a plunger on his horn.

"I'm glad I'm all white to blend in with the environment unlike those other idiots."