Pipe Collectors Gifts

'I didn't know you could get electronic pipes too! Whatever next!'

"What are you thinking about?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Jazz is Invented

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Six jazz instruments.

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"You seem dangerous. I like that."

'This must be heaven, because you sure look like an angel....'

"Why so grim, handsome?"

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Tiny jazz musicians play large drum and bass.

Viola, cello, 1st violin and 2nd violin vending machine.

'Do you come here often?'

OMG UR HOT

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

A man on a desert island writes 'Have a nice day' in glass bottles repeatedly.

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

Trilby - Sandy McAllister,'The Laird of Cockpen'.

Proceedings of the club

Aberdeen Smoking the Pipe of Peace - Aberdeen and France at War with Russia

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Doric, Ionic, Corinthian, and Broken Pillars.

"The harmonica! Boy you're lucky, my cowboy plays the double-bass! I tell you what, it's a pretty awkward thing to carry around..."

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"'You're the reason I crossed the road'? Really?! Is that your best pick-up line?"

"I wonder what this was for."

As you like it - One way of catching fish

"Fancy crashing at my pad later, babe?"

"I'm not all you can eat? But I brought my special plate!"

Sarah Palin Fact #2783, Sarah Palin makes her own diamond earrings by squeezing coal.

'How old is this vase?'