Pint Night Strategist Pillows

'Here's the secret to a profitable 99-cent pint night - 14 ounces of foam, 2 ounces of beer.'

Beer Stall

Beers

Best Before 5th Pint.

"Not much. Just enjoying my post-lunch bounce."

"Stag poker"

'If we're going to have a banking relationship, you'll have to trust me more than this.'

"A pint for me and one for the woad!"

Mr. Blok goes bowling.

"I can't cook, but I can pay."

'Oi! '

'My mom won't let me play 'Merchants of Mayhem.' I tried, but she's a game changer.'

"You'll come? Great." "The Hendersons will be too." "We'll kill them at poker." "Phil and Edna, planning a murder for later that night."

'Increase your beer volume sales by filling the glasses up.'

"You know all the best pubs for lunch, Seamus."

'He is our darts team captain,he always finishes on a double.'

Darts team ordering their drinks using notes attached to darts.

'Nobody likes a bartender who went to college.'

'We just have to win this account, Barbara and I have another litter on the way!'

"Do we have to go Dutch tonight, Arnie? I fancy a Chinese."

'So there's a fly in your beer — why begrudge a fellow creature a little happiness?'

'How would you have played that last ball?'

"A quick pint, Mavis, I'm running on empty!"

"thanks for all your efforts Harry, but I am still going to have to sell the place."

"Of course I'm late. It was a game of two halves, fourteen pints and a night in jail."

Saving Pin Ryan.

'I know you live a life of quiet desperation -- you never shut up about it!'

Men discussing tactics of getting a drink from the bar

"Sometimes I unwind too fast, and it makes me a little dizzy."

'Let's face it Sid. In this pub a 'Happy Hour' is one without a punch up...'

"Do you have anything that would make him seem a lot more attractive?"

I keep a cold pack in my desk drawer to help me cool my emotions before I apprach an argumentative student.

'I'd invite you in for coffee - but I've run out of condoms'

The first date went pretty well