Nighttime Strategists Pillows

General's Office. He put me in charge of nocturnal operations! "The Sarge of the Night Brigade"!

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

"Stag poker"

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

"Goodnight, Dan, you handsome devil!"

Baseball Dreams

The date was going well. She was better looking, but he was about to gain the nutritional edge.

'But I'm not tired yet!!!'

'Sorry!...Recalculating.'

"I can't cook, but I can pay."

"It would keep me awake all night, but I'm up for a game of coffee pong first thing in the morning."

'My mom won't let me play 'Merchants of Mayhem.' I tried, but she's a game changer.'

"You'll come? Great." "The Hendersons will be too." "We'll kill them at poker." "Phil and Edna, planning a murder for later that night."

For workers who are in need of a discreet spot to catch some Z's comes Napquest.

Oh, come on. Don't think of this as 'going to bed.' Think of this as a short break between nighttime naughtiness and morning mayhem.

"Must you bring your work to bed?"

'Here's the secret to a profitable 99-cent pint night - 14 ounces of foam, 2 ounces of beer.'

"Tonight the covers stay on my side."

'Sometimes late at night I'm not sure the leading economic indicators know where they're going,'

'There are four reasons for him to cry...he's hungry, he's wet, a pin is sticking him, or he wants to wake you up from a sound sleep.'

Ready for your presentation? Possibly. I finished my powerpoint at 2 a.m. Would you please check it? Sure. Is this slide a hint to push up sales? Whoops! At 1 a.m. I took a break

"Do we have to go Dutch tonight, Arnie? I fancy a Chinese."

'We just have to win this account, Barbara and I have another litter on the way!'

"See you in the morning."

"Oh, it's just what they call it. I'm sure you can do it at night, too."

The night-shift had an ingenious way of staying awake during the long nights!

"If I knew what our 401k was doing maybe I could sleep."

"Do you have anything that would make him seem a lot more attractive?"

"Did I remember to lock the dungeon?"

"Star light star bright please let me wake up tomorrow and be a cat so I can sleep more and won't get my heart broken so much."

"I'm not 'looking to further my toxic agenda' I'm just telling you it's your bedtime."

Suggestion box attached to headboard on bed

"Here's the plan. I use white noise to cover your snoring and you use earplugs to cover the white noise."

'I've completely forgotten what fourth gear's for.'

Bill got his best ideas late at night.