Picky Shopper Pillows

"It's black, but it's not New York black."

"I'm looking for something special that says 'Meow.'"

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

'I've never opened her up on the highway, but I get great mileage in the city!'

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

Unfinished Funiture Store.

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

'Running your own business means being self-made, unfortunately it also means finding out what you're made of!'

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

Unusual Offers

Latest Greatest Fastest Computer...versus Good Enough.

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

Expensive greeting cards.

'Please enter your pin now.'

'Triple-headed razors?... Aisle seven.'

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

The Bargain Brand

"Does it come with magnets?"

How much would you take off for cash?

"You might say I'm middle-of-the-road. I'd buy a fur coat but I wouldn't buy a Japanese fur coat."

Down on Her.

Mall of ages

Jumble Sale

'I'm sure they make it up in volume.'

'Gee, these are great, are they dishwasher proof?'

'Can we move the beef jerky a smidge and display our organic cleanser?'

Pet shop with recipes stand outside.

'Look, we have 7 and we have 5 . . . I make that 75 �' the number of your house!'