Pianist Gifts

Piano-Tuning Bar

'I hate these purists who play Bach without any pedal'

"Can't say I'm surprised. It's a notoriously difficult piece of music."

"We don't need to push down on the pedal QUITE so hard, Petunia."

"And now, God help us all, Rachmaninoff's Concerto in C Minor."

"These keys seem vaguely familiar."

"I'm sorry, but the flight of the bumblebees has been cancelled."

'His BACH is worse than his bite.'

Beethoven's 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th and Fifth.

'My next selection is a protest song against piano lessons.'

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

'In an inexplicable attack of nerves, Elliot becomes the first person ever to screw up John Cage's 4'33'.

'We should have bought the piano first, and built the igloo around it.'

'Ugh Not Again!'

"I call this next piece, 'Turn Off The Lawn Mower Before You Clean It.'"

"Come on, you know the words! Bum bum bum bum!"

'For my next selection, I will download a music file from the internet.'

'This next song's for anyone who's feeling a little lonely right now.'

"I don't want to play for the audience. I want to play for the fans."

It soon became obvious to all in the theatre that Doug's Bach was worse than his bite.

'OK start her up!'

Fun (circa 1955)

'If only I could write music that would have that much influence over people.'

'The thing I like about jazz is nobody notices if I hit the wrong notes.'

"Enough medical mumbo jumbo, just give it to me straight, Doc-will I ever be able to play piano again?"

"Any requests, babe, before I call it a night?"

"This next song's about pain."

"You people make me sick. Nonetheless, here's a little toe-tapper."

'You win. Go out and play.'

Musician playing the piano on a computer.

A band rendition of Silent Night.

'Pianissimo, pianissimo!'

Octopus on Keys.

"Sonata for Three Frogs"

Robert Schumann