Physical Trainer Gifts

'Let's start the air aerobics class with some free falls.'

'This drill builds mental toughness in the players, but more important, it satisfies my personal desire to hear people scream in agony.'

Workout Calendar

'I'm here to facilitate the steroid intervention.'

'I realize this is an advances aerobics class, but I still don't think we're ready to work out to 'Flight of the Bumble Bee'!'

'He's one of the drawbacks.'

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

Pole Vaulting Accident

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"Good game."

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

"Portrait of a Lady"

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"This feels like an accomplishment."

"Any questions?"

On the back of the t-shirt...

Muscles

Be Healthy

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'