Philosopher On A Budget Pillows

When Tia Carmen says... "The poorest man is not without a cent, but without a dream" it means...she spent $100 at the bingo hall and didn't win anything.

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

Pastorius wonders why.

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

'In my opinion, you're either part of the problem or part of the solution. Unless, of course, you're Jones, who thinks he can just float above it all!'

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know what your office staff are doing?'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

BMA criticises 'Black Hole' of NHS IT spending

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

Financial Eyesight

'Actually I only do this on weekends.'

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

Right now my brother Al is paying a psychiatrist a hundred bucks an hour to hear his troubles, while I'm drinking beer and telling you mine at happy hour prices. Obviously, Al IS the crazy one.

'Well, you're bankrupt, but look on the bright side -- it only cost you eight dollars per transaction!'

"Well, if there is life on Mars, how come they haven't asked us for money?"

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

'Actually, the bill is part of your reality therapy.'

Pollution and money

"I want to tell her I love her and let her know I'm careful with money."

"A thirst for knowledge, …. That was another of my great thirsts."

'I'm not paying $200 per hour for therapy, so you must be the one who's nuts.'

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

"I know it's not an antique but it will be when I've finished paying for it."

'Private schools are really expensive these days - Why don't you home-school him?'

I used to live payday to payday, now I live payday to three days till payday.

When they said more people were choosing to holiday at home I think they meant in the UK

Very sad piggy bank

'The nice thing about our car is we double its value when we fill it up with gas.'

"Diversification doesn't mean hiding the money under the mattress, the sofa and 2 chairs!"

"Why are you typing your own letters?"

"Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?"

'Uncle, we need to up our prices, sand is getting scarce.'

'Retirement, Higgins? -- But at forty hours per week, you've only worked here thirteen years.'

'You'll like him. He's very optimistic - he believes that money can make you happy.'