Philosopher Of Insignificance Gifts

Even if you're the president of a corporation, you're still just the president of a corporation.

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

'Do you have anything for absent-mindedness?'

Lost and forgotten department

"Oh my God -- I just remembered I can fly."

Elderly man at top of stairs with a revolver and an axe: 'I've completely forgotten why I came upstairs.'

"Honey, I'll be right back – I forgot to stop at the bar on the way home."

"How the hell are you?"

The brain cell that was suppose to help me remember.

"If someone says they're a leader and no one hears it, is it true?"

Let me warn you, toots. Celebrity is like radioactivity: you start with a big bang, then comes years with a half-life of slow decay.

Man reading 'Amnesia volume 1' while having a bookshelf full of 'Amnesia Volume 1'

"That's an interesting question, Clint. I don't know if my gun rack is an authentic regionalism or just a macho affectation."

Interior Monologuist

'I'm leaving, I want to see the world. I can't stay here and spend my life watching grass grow!'

'I'm not seeking any answers . . .I don't know anything . . . I'm just lazy!'

"So using all those brown coffee filters literally bought me nothing?"

G7

"I keep forgetting it's not Christmas,"

I've come back here to remember what I forgot in the first place.

'Do you need me to remind you when your wife's birthday is too?'

"Now, what am I here for?"

'There must be an elephant in the room.'

'Don't do today what you can leave for tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, next week or until someone else does it for you.'

Two Men Having Showdown On Small Hill-Top

"I forgot to pay the light bill. I swear, I would forget my head if it wasn't screwed on."

"My work is to stare into space."

"Which would you prefer - coming under fire or being raked over the coals?"

"The end is near."