Isolated Philosopher Gifts

Antisocial Media

"I AM at my usual position."

Emergency Phone.

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

'Actually, I don't get out much. I spend most of my time alone, writing lyrical novels celebrating nature and the interconnectedness of all living things!'

'A-1 security from crime ... but can't stand the isolation.'

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

Lost and forgotten department

"So what books didn't you get around to reading during lockdown?"

"Listen up - today is the first day in the rest of the coronavirus crisis!"

"If someone says they're a leader and no one hears it, is it true?"

Arbitrageur in Exile

Interior Monologuist

"I keep forgetting it's not Christmas,"

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

'I forgot to turn on the gravity this morning.'

Eraserhead

You are here - They are there

"The universal remote. That's how God rules the universe."

I'm Apathetic And Nobody Cares.

"Can he call you back? He's meditating."

'Darn! - Don't you hate it when you forget what you were meditating about?'

'Well, he's progressed from an imaginary friend to an imaginary mentor.'

Day 40 of self-isolation and time had taken on a different concept.

"We suburb, son; therefore, we grill."

'I'm not here!'

"I can't find my chi!"

Desert Island Empty Except For Nixon Sign

Waiting for the Sun

'...I can accept that bad things sometimes happen to good people. What drives me nuts is how all the good things always seem to happen to people I can't stand!'

Socially Distant Earth

'Edgeworth has come to terms with himself. He likes himself very much but can't stand anyone else.'

"Every password I've ever had."