Petroliana Collecting T-Shirts

Gas Station: Unexplainable Price Increases

Director/Action Man toy.

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

The Missing Sock Returns

"You're on a what?!"

"Well....I could've done this!"

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

King Kongs first christmas

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"Yes sir, I'll admit I was sceptical about the whole 'mini-office' concept at first..."

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"Oh no I left my bagpipes in the oven."

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

Posh Easter Egg

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'Qualifications aside, Mr Thumb, this is the cutest resume I've ever seen.'

'Talk about stuck-up! -- he has Masterpiece Theatre action figures!'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

Haunted museum

A man in bathrobe smoking a pipe sits in an armchair as a dog delivers endless pairs of shoes and boots to him.

"You have ice water in your veins."

"I bought a fake rock to cover up this ugly rock."

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"Face it, Tim, that cute little Pet Rock you bought in 1976 is now a full-grown boulder - it's time to set him free!"