Pet Security Guru Pillows

"It's a smart refrigerator that requires a password to open it. They always use one of our names. Their lack of creativity has finally caught up with them."

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

Bathing the dog

Cats on Board.

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"I know we've had our differences in the past but if you scratch behind my ears I'll show you where the catnip is kept."

'Best watchdog I ever had!'

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

"Yeah, this many ways to contact her if I'm lost might be overkill."

"Gary! Thank God you're home. The automatic pet feeder seems to be malfunctioning again."

Pretty Soon: Robot pets won't provide the valuable life lessons flesh pets did.

'If you had asked me I could have TOLD you that he bites.'

"It's mouseborn."

'Most dogs chase cars, Sally but mine is into them!'

'Don't you miss the thrill of the chase?'

"Thank you all for attending this first conference of the surveillance camera recording industry."

'To sped up our sandbox compliance issues I've called in a couple of sandbox experts.'

'I hear a burglar downstairs, the poor fool.'

"Murchison’s theory is that it’s dog hair in your fuel line.”

Username/Password

"My owners named me Kvduer92hybH20UDF8fhsj becuase they wanted to remember a strong password for their online banking."

"Can you believe we walked right past security?"

"He calls it an 'accident' but you and I both know that was no accident."

'You know it's time to bath the dog when he starts to smell like a gym bag!'

"Am I rusting? I think one of my sections is sinking. Oh, no! I thought I heard the gate squeak."

Lion with hair straighteners.

'My masters have upgraded the security system: There's a ten-digit passcode on the cat-flap now...'

"It's all set. If your husband tries to get into the fridge after 9pm he'll receive an electrical shock

Bathroom privacy options: A guide.

'Are you aware that a dog can choke to death on chicken bones?'

"I'm the temp."

Clumping and Non-Clumping Cat Litter

"I taught him how to speak, shake hands and, as you can see, fetch information."

"Hi honey, I'm home."