Pet Pun Fan Gifts

Sign at pet shop reads, 'Warning! Do not buy if seal is broken.'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

Chicken Little Inc. Pecking Order.

"It's a recipe called no-cook fish chowder."

Cupid misses his shot.

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

Office supplies - Notebooks, memo pads and rap sheets.

'That was nice of them to order us a new scratching post!'

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

Snacks. Food. Drinks. Win! Play! LOTTO here! I changed my name to "Lottery Ticket" and hang out here. It's a great place to get scratched!

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

"This isn't what I had in mind, when you said you were going to buy me some waterfront property."

'He's not big enough to use the toilet yet.'

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

Dogs Home: Beware of the Human

Chasebook for Dogs

'Maybe you should try flowers?'

To keep cool in the summer, Victor installed a whole-house flan.

"The deal looks cut and dried to me but Haskins smells a rat."

Some Zoomies

Using dogs as greeters at church was a failed experiment.

'Satchel, I have a hunch...'

'Sure, we could fetch things for them, but why raise their expectations.'

I tried thinking outside the box once. That was a big mistake!

"I'm very proud of the grade A's, son, but what about these grade B smalls?"

Sir Isaac Newton discovers even more gravity.

"Mr. Jingles thinks they sell it on eBay."

Wordilly Durdillies - A cow putt

"Father Michael has a wicked sense of humour."

"...31, 32, 33, 34! Boy o boy, the old lady moving in next door has 34 cats!"

'They're for a friend.'

'I don't think much of the punchline.'