Pet Peeve Pundit Gifts

"Hold up-I got sand in my shoe again."

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

"Hear ye! Hear ye! Look, having nuclear - my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at M.I.T. - good genes, very good genes, O.K., very smart. . ."

Neuro, Biology, Chemistry, Feedback, Psychology, Technology, Physiology Institute

"Suppose you tell me why you want to be a faceless drone at Globatron Inc.?"

'Wow, are all these desserts for here, or are you going to stuff your faces in the privacy of your own home?'

'Why is it always about me?'

"Their bookshelves look more convincingly read from than ours."

"Once you've jumped over the moon, standing around in a field all day just doesn't cut it."

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

"I found out the hard way what a short hop it is from 'Seize the Day' to 'Seize the Money!'"

"In view of climate change, I'd put all my money into ice cream, mineral water and weapons!"

"And that was the news. . . But please feel free to go online and vent your spite, spread your conspiracy theories and promote your ill-informed opinions. . ."

Old soldiers never die. They just become TV pundits.

"Of course my main concern is how the situation in Eastern Europe will affect the pennant race."

'Look! If I wave these around I can generate electricity!'

'Not a problem. Our industry is self-regulated. In fact, I'm scheduled to jump off the roof right after this meeting.'

"Technically, when the manufacturer wants your car back, it's a recall. When the bank does it, it's a repossession."

Oval Office

'Ok cup cake looks like its time to meet your maker.'

"Don't feel bad. Shallow people make my job easy."

"These days, professor it's "T.V. punditry or perish.""

Big government pig

Vernon Trunick with the 3 O'Clock Report

"The pound is reaching parity with Liz Truss."

"These are my 'Nebraska attack poodles'. They don't bark, they don't bite, they just do exactly what they're told. . ."

"I do, too, notice the little things, and most of them irritate me."

'Do you know how much it cost me to LEARN all this psychobabble?'

'I found it difficult to put down, but I will. It's trite rubbish.'

Dogs discussing human commend pet peeves.

"Why does she wait until I'm sleeping to knock the pencil around the apartment?"

A Dog Who Never Got His Day.

"Can't you clip your nails on the subway like everyone else?"

"Pushing buttons with anything other than your index finger is an affectation."