Pet Patrol Champ T-Shirts

"You'll have to wait till we get home, I've run out of bags."

Police Feline Unit

A man and his dog

"This is why I want you to remember the three most important words in the world: spay, neuter, adopt."

A Change of Scene.

'If you had asked me I could have TOLD you that he bites.'

Watchdog

"Not really. I went on the green carpet just before we came out."

'Let's do the Good Dog, Bad Dog routine.'

'Urgh!. . . That's disgusting.'

"Look at you! What's your name? Huh, cutie? What's your name? I can see the man walking you is of no help. We won't judge his rude behavior. No, we won't, will we?…"

'That's right, my Master follows me on my walk with a plastic bag in his hand: I have no privacy anymore...'

"The sniffer dog had found cocaine again."

'Are you aware that a dog can choke to death on chicken bones?'

'Top dog or not, you gotta slow down.'

"That's Charles' new gun dog."

"Well, the date was going well until she asked me what my job is in the Police Force. "Cadaver Dog" does not seem to be the answer she was after..."

"The bones...have they been buried for the full 21 days?"

Don't do it, kid. Think. Think.

"In the middle of the night, I could see a guy trying to steal the neighbour's car, so I barked, but the neighbour yelled at me to shut up, so I did. . ."

'You're not still mad about all the toys I bought Zeus on my trip are you? I got you something too.'

Poo Bags

'Look out - a snooper from Environmental Health.'

"I'm not going "walky" with my master! I'm a guard dog, we're doing rounds!"

'Greg, if your cell phone was set to vibrate, I think I've located it.'

"Don't do it, kid. Think. Think."

'...There's something about rescued dogs - they're just eager to please.'

Man eyeing up woman walking dog, while his dog is eyeing up her dog.

"First let me give you my conspectus."

The Dog whisperer.

The Karate Gardener