Pet Owner Ponderer T-Shirts

"That 'Love thy neighbor' part, does that include cats?"

'I ask you: How can putting us in a glass bowl with plastic plants be entertaining to them?'

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

"Lemme know when you’re ready to howl at it."

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

"And where have you previously moused?"

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'Super Dog'

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

Haute Suture

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

'They make remarkably clean pets.'

Rusty starts to have very violent thoughts toward his tail.

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

Cat with Nine Still Lives