Pet Owner Chuckler T-Shirts

"If she can find all the bones she's buried, she's my next investment counselor."

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Dog Dressed to Eat

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

'Sometimes I feel sorry for those little baitfish, don't you, Ben?'

'Could we go in ahead of you? His tranquilizer is wearing off.'

"Well, if it wasn't you who meowed, and it certainly wasn't me who meowed...then...who...meowed?"

When Pugs dream.

"Generally, when we go around the table sharing what we're grateful for, we just *say* it, Jerry."

"Oh, God, am I housebroken."

'What did I tell you about feeding your pet beaver table scraps?'

'You know that's not what I meant when I asked you to take the dog out!'

Cat Show - Sheds Most

'Well, it wasn't me.'

'This is going to hurt me more than it will hurt you!'

'She think we're waiting out here in this sun? Hot-wire this sucker!'

Will act like an idiot for food.

"That's where I do 'my business'."

"Leave the toilet."

'I'm good with sheep. . .'

"Guess what I learned in band class today?"

Don't forget to feed the python...

"'I'm a good dog, Mama, I'll bring you your daily news. I'm a good dog, Mama, I don't chew my master's shoes. But there's one thing life has learnt me - Even good dogs get the blues.' Blow some sweet harp for me, Lucky."

'Sorry, they don't eat homework.'

Cat looking up fish recipes.

Re-explore familiar surroundings. You may come across some fresh, new surprises!

'Remember, the best time to walk on it is just after they've washed it.'

"I keep getting into a flap."

'What's my super power compared to you ...everything.'

"I don't care if you have a heavy date...I'll thank you to stay out of my aftershave!"

101 uses of a dead cat: cigarette dispenser

"Pardon me, cat. I know we're not on the best of terms. But while you're at it, perhaps you could assist me with one small task..."

"You stepped right in dog ship and now you're dragging it all over the house."

"Yeah, I wouldn't be too concerned about how stupid that cone looks."

'Now what?'