Pet Mischief Connoisseur Gifts

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

"Jerk." "Jackass." "Screw you." "Bite me."

"He still doesn't know how to use the litter tray."

"Why would I care of you scratch the couch? I'm not allowed on it..."

"Dear God, no! Not her first edition of 'Franny and Zooey'! You've ruined us!!"

Dog makes cats float with helium.

"See. I told you they have Roomba Rodeos when we're gone."

'Okay, let me see your hands, your feet, and that wily prehensile tail...'

'Journey of self-discovery' Dog realizes he can make his leg move when he scratches.

Dog reaching over top of counter to steal cookies.

"You know what I love? Rolling in dead squirrel." "Oh, my God, yes! How about peeing on the floor at Petco?!" "Wait, wait–what's the farthest distance either of you have rubbed your butt across a carpet?!"

Cat lights rocket strapped to a dog

"Here it comes, another one of his classic non-apologies."

'You talk about a clean dog!'

'They get along beautifully. The dog thinks he's a cat, and the cat thinks she's a dog.'

'You've got it wrong,luv-it's Fido who's the boozer!'

"Wait, you've never tried destroying a sofa?!" "Dude, it's so much fun, and harmless." "You've tried catnip, right? Oh, but tons! You have to!" "Cat peer pressure"

'I guess I should have let sleeping dogs lie.'

"That's not the moon, you idiot ... it's a night light!"

Thoughtful Dog

'They're Home!!!... HA-HA-HA... you are soooo busted!'

"Do you have any idea what you've done? There are twelve hundred bottles of cognac on that ship!"

"The Chaetodon capistratus, commonly known as the four-eyed butterfly fish, is monogamous."

'I'm going out of business because he ate the lemon.'