Pet-loving Brother Pillows

Dog helping scientist.

"It's ten o'clock. Do you know where your puppy is?"

'Why are you laughing? This is a grave matter.'

Plaids set man apart from the lower animals

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

"Can I keep them? I found him on the internet?"

Skeleton playing fetch.

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

Haute Suture

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"This never happened."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

'She still won't accept that she's the cat, and not the meow.'

Dog wearing a cone

"No I said fetch , not wretch.."

''I couldn't wait any longer.''

Chasebook

Pet Entertainers

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

"Big n' tall" "Small n' long"

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

'We had him trained to stay off the furniture, right up until we gave up.'

Separation

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

'It says here: while most dogs are family dogs, some dogs like one family member more. Do you think Fritzi is like that?'

'No, first start the engine, then bark!'

"C'mon. Get out there and go tinkle already."

Cat king.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...