Pet Lover With A Quirky Sense Of Humor Pillows

"He ran out of pee."

"What if, instead of the safe being filled with rawhide, it's filled with catnip and mice!" "No one will buy it." "Drugs and rodents? Who's our demographic?" "The Simpsons already did that."

Dog Dressed to Eat

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

"This resumé has the kind of sizzle we're looking for."

Pin the blame on the donkey.

"And I suppose you expect me to pick that up?"

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

"Wow, what a DILF."

Roget's Pet

"We're slapping you with a stress suit, pal!"

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'My dad must like you, or he would have charged by now.'

Al's Teachers' Pets.

"Me? I'm taking the dog for a silly walk."

A skinny dog with clown make up

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

"Don't put your money into stocks. Bury it!"

'Your disgusting behaviour has been almost human in nature!'

'I do some light mousework for them in return for room and board.'

'Okay...now watch what happens when I extend my claws.'

"Actually, I would rather have a dog. It's just that we need the eggs."

The firehouse has a cat instead of a dalmation.

"I have to tell you you were not my first choice for this job."

'You seem pretty wound up today.'

"Here he comes! Don't move."

'I was not expecting this, were you?'

"One more question. Would you mind if corporate implanted a chip between your shoulder blades?"

'It's her signature dish.'

Pet shop with recipes stand outside.

'It's not art - I just overfed my goldfish!'

'I know how you feel.'