Pet Fish Gifts

'This wide, wonderful world you promised is making me dizzy!'

Fish Sticks

"It's only temporary, Goldie, I broke my glasses."

'I wonder why goldfish are gold.' - 'So they don't rust.'

Irritable Bowl Syndrome

New! Weeping gourami: 'How can you tell if they're 'weeping'?'

'Traitor! I hate you!'

"I'll have him ring you back, at the moment he's feeding the fish. . ."

"I'll drill a hole in the side and we'll be FREE!!"

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

Playing Fetch.

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

Police Feline Unit

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"Actually, make that a double cream."

A crowd of happy pet owners.

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"Pick me!"

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."