Pet Fish Gifts

'This wide, wonderful world you promised is making me dizzy!'

"It's only temporary, Goldie, I broke my glasses."

'I wonder why goldfish are gold.' - 'So they don't rust.'

Irritable Bowl Syndrome

New! Weeping gourami: 'How can you tell if they're 'weeping'?'

'Traitor! I hate you!'

"I'll have him ring you back, at the moment he's feeding the fish. . ."

"I'll drill a hole in the side and we'll be FREE!!"

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

Playing Fetch.

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

Police Feline Unit

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

A crowd of happy pet owners.

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"Pick me!"

"Actually, make that a double cream."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"Why do they do that?"