Pet Experimenter Gifts

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"Young Frankenstein"

"Pick me!"

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

Canine Companion

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

" 'Grrr' is not a word."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Yound Einstein disproves an early theory: 'Aha! A watched pot DOES boil!'

"He's already getting attached to you."

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

Love Conquers All

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"Did you get my tweet?"

Couple sitting in living room reading books while dog reads a book with a cat shaped cover.

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

"What if, instead of the safe being filled with rawhide, it's filled with catnip and mice!" "No one will buy it." "Drugs and rodents? Who's our demographic?" "The Simpsons already did that."

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

Pets.

"Look. They say sit, you sit. They say roll over, you roll over. Where's the prob?"

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

"If you can’t beat ’em, roll around in their decaying carcass."

Author's Bio-diversity.

"The video of you eating my $700 John Varvatos got 300 'likes.'"

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'

Codepetdency Counseling: "He won't even sit on my lap anymore."