Pet Bird Humorist Gifts

'Take me to your feeder,'

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

Hats and Food

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

"Scuba cow"

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

"Yes, one is a dog."

'Jurassic Pork.'

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

'I'd like to return this, please.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

Cats at private view

Dogs life

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

"Yep. Looks like we have ringworm."

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'