Pest Control Punster Pillows

Woodworm surrenders with a white flag, as man treats floorboards with woodworm killer.

'Hold it. It's Uncle Ezra!'

"Don't do it! You've got so much to live for!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

The Endless Battle of the Organic Gardener

Intelligent people laugh too!

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

Assault 'n' Vinegar

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

"Houston, we have a problem."

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Good News about winter

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

Man using to much bug spray

'I found the termites!'

'Did you watch the horror movie?'

“...And on the ninth day God created mosquitoes, just to annoy the hell out of everyone.”

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

Sweep the board.

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Adam names the animals (He puts sticky notes on them saying Shaz, Dave, Trish etc).

Giant slug attacks a city

Garden pond: mosquito breeding ground

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

"Careful. That house has a taser."

"Where were you between 4 and 6?"