Periscope Ponderer Gifts

'Up periscope!'

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"I'm sorry, but we're looking for someone who's more likely to be followed than following."

"Listen to this: 'Technology reduces the time we spend on a given task, but increases the number of tasks we're expected to do.' Sounds like a no-win situation to me!"

Optimist

'Why don't you try seeing it from your point of view?'

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

"What's your favorite planet, Randy?" "There is only one answer, little buddy. There is only one planet full of lush, green forests and beautiful, windswept ocean vista... all of which are natural aphrodisiacs that inspire lovers, philosophers and poets." "You know, Pandora is not a real planet." "I'm talking about Earth, you... Do you ever go outside?"

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

"May I offer a very different scenario?"

WANTED Dead or Alive - Schrodinger's Cat.

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

"WOW, we're on top of the world!"

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

"I have good news and bad news about your cat, Dr Schrodinger..."

Schrödinger and his cat

"What if Newton came up with a different idea from a fallen apple."

"What's important is that we learn from what we must never admit happened."

Another Time Travel Pair o' Ducks.

"Most people forget they've had amnesia."

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

NASA, 'I thought I smelled oxygen!'

"Oh my God, help! Is there a logician on board?!"

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

F&E Subs. Hey, you replaced the little swords with periscope-shaped toothpicks! Nice touch, Ernie!

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

"If the universe is expanding, that's all the more reason to get back to the city."