Perfectionism Queen Gifts

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

Bullseye!

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

'Aren't you glad we brought our putters, too?'

Golf lessons

'Not that slowly back...'

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'Even in the mundane tasks, aim for perfection!'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'No,silly-I asked for a sand WEDGE!'

For sale - Used only Once.

Perfection

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

'Don't just stand there, get into focus!'

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

'Don't ask me, I've never got one in a hole either.'

'On to the office again?' - 'No, my pro.'

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

"You're welcome."

Cuts, Measurements, Certain, Sloppy

'Do I take it that you will not be requiring my services on the back nine?'

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

A tailor measuring a jacket.

'You had a 9 on one, a 7 on two, a 10 on three, a 23 on four...that hurt...'

There are more things to life than golf--but I ignore them.

"I can be perfect for only one hour a day."

Warren knew the importance of getting down as low as possible to sight his putts.

'You're away, Doc!'

'On this hole you don't drive, just putt.'

'Oh no. How are you going to get it out of that little hole?'