Perfectionism Queen Pillows

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

Bullseye!

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

'There! See that? Brad just happens to morph into some kind of hideous amphibian just as he's about to putt? Now tell me she's not cheating!'

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

'Aren't you glad we brought our putters, too?'

Golf lessons

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

'Not that slowly back...'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'Even in the mundane tasks, aim for perfection!'

'No,silly-I asked for a sand WEDGE!'

For sale - Used only Once.

Perfection

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

'Don't just stand there, get into focus!'

'Don't ask me, I've never got one in a hole either.'

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

'Do I take it that you will not be requiring my services on the back nine?'

Cuts, Measurements, Certain, Sloppy

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

'On to the office again?' - 'No, my pro.'

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

"You're welcome."

A tailor measuring a jacket.

"I can be perfect for only one hour a day."

There are more things to life than golf--but I ignore them.

'You had a 9 on one, a 7 on two, a 10 on three, a 23 on four...that hurt...'

'On this hole you don't drive, just putt.'

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

'Oh no. How are you going to get it out of that little hole?'

'Whenever Ralph finds a golf ball he puts it in the basement.'