Pensive Philosopher Gifts

'I just realized that the average age of all my old friends' is 'dead'.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Chiller Theatre

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

Gunter Grass

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

George Orwell

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

"I cross the road to forget."

"Is this who I am?"

Non Thought For The Day.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

'Dad, what is peace?'

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

"Remember that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

"Don’t think of that tennis ball as lost. Think of it as finally free."

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

"If there is a heaven, why do we end up as fossil fuel?"

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

Lost and Profound.

How did life begin? Image shows a strand of dna in the form of a question mark (with a single cell as the dot, floating in water or primeval soup). The image also refers to life beyond the earth, with the cell-like blobs resembling galaxies in outer space

"Never mind 'what does it all mean?' What does anything mean?"

Understanding art.

'It's not so much you having a cockroach problem - it's more along the lines of us having a human problem.'

"I'd let you in, but I'm not sure I'm all here today"

'Son, life is a mixed blessing, they eat the fancy nuts and toss us the peanuts.'

"Do you think there's life out there?"

"I think, therefore I am depressed."

Just what is it that amoebas really want.