Penpal Enthusiast Gifts

'You're lucky: I can't have a penpal 'cause we don't have a fixed address...'

"Apparently she's your Philippino penfriend come to visit"

Where Indian ink came from.

Letter Collecting Nerd

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

'Sorry mate. Your church doesn't meet the minimum building code.'

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

"Be or be not. There is no question."

Letter writing lady.

The novel was printed and in the stores ... any minute now, the world would beat down his door.

'You seem very confident this morning.'

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

Deadlines, kill fees. Who comes up with these terms?

"Can I borrow a pen?"

List making as therapy.

'V. K. Duvine and Prodigal Son (if he comes back)

Beaten up man to Good Samaritan: 'Thank you. My insurance doesn't cover roadside service.'

'Instead of teaching me useless tricks like rolling over and fetching, how about teaching me to ride that motorcycle of yours?'

Droplet with a pencil.

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

"She's taking a lot of affection pressure off you."

'This dingo penpal of his - they're Australian aren't they?'

Guide dog reading paper to blind man.

Mourning Pens

Dear Bertha - I'd write more often, but I always seem to be out of ink! Love, Oggy

'We can't offer you the satisfaction of a gratifying career, but how does a paid week off and dental sound?'

"Dude! I'm writing a letter to my parents. How many N's in money?"

Francois Mauriac.

'Are you still sure the pen is mightier than the sword?'

MAIL CALL AT THOMPSON, HALVERSON, SPIELMAN & OSGOOD

Writing a letter

"Well, if you can't accept me as I really am, have you seen my Facebook page?"

'Pen no write.'

The End Of My Pen's Ink Supply Is Nea