Pen Pal Adventurer Gifts

The Writer

Letter Collecting Nerd

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

Letter writing lady.

"Be or be not. There is no question."

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

The novel was printed and in the stores ... any minute now, the world would beat down his door.

'You seem very confident this morning.'

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

Deadlines, kill fees. Who comes up with these terms?

"Can I borrow a pen?"

Zero gravity and subzero gravity explained.

"Hang on - I'll Uber us a school bus."

List making as therapy.

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

Mourning Pens

"I've joined the world's fastest growing social media website..."

Dear Bertha - I'd write more often, but I always seem to be out of ink! Love, Oggy

"Go into Settings, Privacy, Activity Controls, Web Activity, Manage Activity, and deselect Giant Snake."

"Dude! I'm writing a letter to my parents. How many N's in money?"

'Are you still sure the pen is mightier than the sword?'

Francois Mauriac.

Writing a letter

'Pen no write.'

MAIL CALL AT THOMPSON, HALVERSON, SPIELMAN & OSGOOD

The End Of My Pen's Ink Supply Is Nea

'We met speed dating, had a whirlwind romance...'

He had to update his OS, download an app, get a username, choose a password, log in to a health portal, navigate to messages and write his doctor … by then it was too late.

Finally, a fanny-pack he could be proud of.

'You're lucky: I can't have a penpal 'cause we don't have a fixed address...'

Paper airplanes drop pen nibs

Whisky idea