Penny-pinching Navigator Pillows

'We'd like a GPS device that would direct us to affordable gas.'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

'There will be no raises this year since the state now has a lottery.'

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

"I just..."

'How effective is this new weight-loss regime?' 'We can guarantee you'll lose £50 at your signing on.'

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

Okay, start shouting them in for their annual bonuses.

Department of Nanotechnology

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"I'm taking your advice and saving my money!"

Blowing dust off an order book.

"Your portfolio is too conservative."

Does your accountant share your enthusiasm for the future...We're fantastically excited about the new project!

"I hate check writing, but, hey, it pays the bills."

'Dave will only turn the heating on when he thinks it's absolutely necessary.'

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

"All I have left to cut is my lunch money."

World's cheapest car

"We're going to have to save some money...and one way is to rewrite the rules on expenses claim."

"Go about a foot and take a right, then it's the second left, no, no ... the third left, then straight …"

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...