Peacekeeper Mom Gifts

Mother telling off quarreling children

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

Wedding Day Itinerary.

Israel/Palestine Conflict

"That's the last time I'm going to allow politics to be discussed in the office."

"I think we'd make a good team!"

Home Sweet Home

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

'If you take this job, you will need child care... that's my second job.'

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

Anti-war libra.

UNFADED GLORY

'Wouldn't it be cheaper to apologise to the Middle East?'

Human rights

"The session isn't quite going to plan."

The problem is, too many people aren't the least bit particular about their arrows.

A world divided by the war

"Perhaps we got off on the wrong paw."

"World War III? Hmm. O.K., but, remember, nobody gets hurt."

'So we're agreed: we'll go to mediation.'

'How long have you been fighting?'

Thanksgiving Family Get-Togethers

"This is our new head of conflict resolution."

Earth and war

Whiskey wars

'Here, William, take this - the G8 has chosen you to nip over for a one-to-one with Assad...'

Uncle Mort, you fought in Korea, right? You think that war will start up again? Not if I can help it. It was the morning of July 27, nineteen hundred and fifty-three. I was pinned down on Pork Chop Hill. My bazooka had run out of ammo. All I could find to load into it was a stuffed panda bear. I loaded it and fired that bear into the maw of the enemy. It struck one of them atop the noggin. Moments later, the armistice was signed. Every July 27th, I awaken at dawn and chuck that same panda at the

A divided world.

'Negotiating skills need fine tuning.'

"Tell me, how long have you been having these feelings of inadequacy?"